Have you ever noticed that anyone who really wants to can always find a Scripture to support his point of view? I recently dealt with such an one, who had focused in on a verse in Proverbs that allowed him, in his mind, to place all blame on the other party and justify his unwillingness to reconcile. I knew this person to be a student of the Scriptures, and wondered how many times he had read Ephesians 4:32 concerning forgiveness, or Matthew 6:12, or Colossians 3:13, or any number of passages that tell us we are to seek forgiveness and restoration? I dare say he has probably even memorized some of them at one time or another.All to no avail. Now he was angry, and his feelings were hurt. He intended to get even and he was determined to justify it even at the expense of the truth he undoubtedly knows. So life again demonstrates the proof of Scripture. "All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes." Solomon recorded it. Paul repeated it in 1 Corinthians 4:4. We should take note of it, not only for dealing with others but also for placing a guard on our own hearts. We are very, very good at fooling ourselves. But we cannot and will not fool our Father in heaven. He "weighs the spirits", sees what's on the inside. And his judgement is perfect, truthful and accurate.
In this man's case, God knows he's angry and hurt. God knows why. And God is waiting--waiting for him to abandon his personal pity party and call out to God for the grace to do what's right, to forgive and go forward. That's the path to a tender spirit and sweet fellowship. The alternative, to stay angry and unforgiving, is to walk the road to bitterness and destruction.